Void (Phan)
by thisisalpacalypse
Summary: When Dan comes out as bi, only his brother, Joe, accepts him for it. When he is left completely alone, one simple gesture is enough to save him. (terrible I know, but it's my first story so I've never done this before)
1. Chapter 1

Well, here's how it all happened.

Let me introduce myself first, because this'll go nowhere if you don't know my name, now will it? My name's Dan, I'm nothing special, just plain old average Dan. Also, I'm bisexual. Sounds a bit blunt, but it's important to the story so there you go. Right, here we go, I'll stop rambling and get on with the actual story.

I came out as bi when I was 17. I'd known for a while, but along with knowing that, I also knew that my family and friends would not approve. Not in the slightest. I knew that my parents would most likely disown me or kick me out or something, because they really hated gay people; they really were an uptight pair.

My brother on the other hand was a bit of an enigma - I never really knew what he'd think about it. I still, however, kept it all bottled up, I couldn't risk coming out and having everyone hate me at that stage.

So I lied. For 3 years, I lied about my sexuality to please my family. I hated lying, I always have, and after those 3 years of turmoil, I snapped.  
This was one lie that I couldn't keep up anymore, so, in the middle of a casual family dinner, I just said it.

I came out, there and then.

Of course, my parents stormed out, my mother in tears and my dad looking about ready to punch someone, the likely target being myself. All I could do was sit there, crying my own silent tears of remorse, as any hope I'd had of them accepting me as I was shattered like the glass I had dropped the previous day. I always had a clinical case of butterfingers, but that's off the topic.

I just remained as I was, tears streaking my still face, as my brother Joe watched me carefully. To my shock, he hadn't fled the scene along with my parents. He stayed put, just examining me as I cried. But what he did next was the part that stunned me the most.

He got up, walked around the oak table to where I sat, and hugged me. Just hugged me. It was a long, meaningful hug, and I could tell it was sincere. When he finally broke his embrace, he said one last thing to me before leaving.

"That's okay."

And that was all I needed; to know that someone accepted me, that someone still loved me despite of my being bi.

It was like a ray of sunlight piercing the dark gray clouds that had so quickly descended on me.


	2. Chapter 2

**_AUTHOR'S NOTE_**** : Hey guys, thank you to the 3 of you who followed this story, I really appreciate it! I've written most of the story, so I'll upload a chapter each day (give or take) and if you could post a review saying how you liked it or think I could improve, I'd really appreciate whatever you have to say :) THANKS!**

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A few weeks passed of my parents only talking to me when absolutely necessary, and to be honest, if it wasn't for Joe being so kind and helpful, I wouldn't have got through that time. He was the only person that stood by me after I came out. All my (admittedly few) friends had alienated me, and apart from him, I was completely alone.

I am so thankful he was there for me.

Anyway, the important thing about Joe happened when we went to our first Muse concert together. It was a cold Saturday night in the depths of winter, which, in Wokingham, means it's fucking freezing. We were walking home, wrapped in our hoodies which were way too light to keep us warm (it never did occur to us to bring a jacket), and we decided to take a shortcut through the old alleyways to get home before we caught hypothermia.

What idiots we were.

It was almost pitch black now, and we were casually strolling through one of the most daunting alleyways on our route home, when I heard Joe let out a bloodcurdling scream. Before I could run to him, I felt a hand clasp over my mouth. I heard Joe scream again, and I used every ounce of strength I had to try and struggle free of the stranger's iron grip, but to no avail.

All I remember from then on was Joe crying out my name, and dull stabbing pain in my leg, and then blackness.

I woke up only to see various thin tubes that led into my hand.


	3. Chapter 3

I looked around, still a dull throbbing in my head which caused all my senses to blur. I could just about make out a monitor, a figure of some sort and my own body lying flat out in front of my. From this and the tubes poking out of my hand, I concluded I must be in a hospital.

As my sense of sight gradually sharpened up, I could see the figure was a nurse. Obviously my parents weren't there; they cared too little for that. She finished adjusting the bag of fluid that was flowing into my hand, and then turned around to notice my eyes staring at her. She smiled, a lovely warm, sunny smile at that, and proceeded to sit down beside my bed.

"Hi, Daniel, is it?" she said, quietly though, as if she didn't want to startle me.

"I-I'd prefer Dan" I replied, my social awkwardness rearing it's head in the form of an untamable stutter.

"Alright Dan, seeing as you've just woken up, I'll explain what happened." I sat up a little, not knowing what to expect. "It's been 2 days since you were attacked, and you've experienced no medical issues sicne then. Your stab wound-"

"Wait a minute", I interrupted, "Stab wound?!"

"Ah, I see. Yes, the attacker stabbed you in your left thigh, and the wound has been treated and is healing very well. No other serious damage was caused, just a few bruises from the grip, and you should be ready to leave in about a day. Now, on the subject of your brother-"

"Joe!" I cut in once more "Is he alright? Did he get hurt badly? When can I see him? Is he okay?"

"Dan, if you'd please let me finish." The nurse seemed a lot less sunny now. "Your brother...he got hurt very badly during this attack. He suffered a stab wound to the shoulder and the stomach, and I'm afraid that his condition is a lot less stable than that of yourself."

I looked at her, horrified at what I had let happen to Joe, trying to process what had just been said.

"H-his stomach wound has unfortunately become infected. Due to it's placement, this infection is very serious...it could be fatal. I'm so sorry, but it looks like Joe may not live through the next week."

I sat there, still, petrified. I couldn't believe what she had just told me; I didn't want to believe it. Joe didn't deserve this. He was everything that a person should be. Kind. Loving. Good hearted.

Accepting.

A tear rolled down my cheek, a silent prayer that Joe would be okay.

I needed him there. I needed him to hold me again, and tell me that it's okay again. I needed him to be the only friend I had again.

He couldn't die.

He just couldn't.

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**_AUTHOR'S NOTE_**** : I'm so sorry these chapters are so short, I'll work on it if I write another story, but I've written all the chapters for this so they'll all be around this length. SORRY!**


	4. Chapter 4

I was let out of hospital that afternoon, earlier than the nurse had predicted. As soon as I got out of that room I ran to find Joe.

The sight that greeted me was not a happy one.

He lay there almost motionless, eyes closed, chest rising and falling ever so slightly. His dark chestnut hair falling over to one side in thick waves, hiding half of his face from view. One hand one his chest, one draped just over the side of the bed, fingers curled in slightly.

Countless tubes and wires stuck into his hands, wrists and arms. A huge bandage over his right shoulder.

Where the attacker stabbed him.

He looked so peaceful, so at rest, but I knew better, I knew he was fighting a war inside, a war that required all his outside strength to battle.

I hoped with all my being that he wouldn't lose.

And then, the worst moment of my life happened.

The line on the heart monitor went flat.

The regular beeps turned into one continuous, life-ruining drone.

The nurses flooded in and ushered me out.

That was the last time I saw him.

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**_AUTHORS'S NOTE_**** : I'm sorry for the awful chapter, I hope the rest are better! I'M SO SORRY**


	5. Chapter 5

**_AUTHORS'S NOTE_**** : I AM SO SORRY I HAVEN'T UPLOADED I have a memory like a sieve and just forgot I'm so sorry! WEL THE SUSPENSE IS OVER here you go guys! Also, thank you so much for the reviews, it means so much to me that you like my stuff :)**

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He was gone.

The one ray of sunlight in the dark gray clouds that hung so ominously over me was gone.

Snatched from me in the blink of an eye.

From that moment onward, I felt a void in my body, a void that could never be filled once he wasn't there to comfort me and be my friend.

I felt like there was no way I could become whole again.

I mourned for at least 3 months, barely leaving my room except for school, but I wasn't really there even then. The amount of times I had broken down in the middle of a lecture at the mere thought of a happy memory spent with Joe have been way too many to begin trying to count. Everything reminded me of him; it was impossible to escape the haunting memories of his last words to me. The screams, the crying, the futile shouting.

The sound of the heart monitor.

I couldn't get away from it, and every time I thought of how I could have saved him if I hadn't been so damn useless, if I hadn't been so weak, if I hadn't been so useless, I couldn't hold back the tsunamis of tears that seemed to be infinite. It should have been me, I should have been the one to die, not Joe. He was so pure, so perfect, everything that I wasn't. He deserved to live, whereas I should have been gone years ago. I didn't deserve to get out with only a small wound when Joe had his life taken away from him.

These thoughts engulfed me all too often, and as you can expect, it got too much.

I ran to the gargantuan bridge over the river, the void beginning to engulf me from the inside out, and as I approached the middle of the river, I came to a sudden halt.

I took a moment to remember Joe, because I was pretty sure he was listening at that point.

Then I returned to my mission.

I walked robotically to the edge of the bridge, stepped up onto the lowest metal railing.

Higher.

Higher.

Higher.

And I was on the second railing from the top. Staring off into the distance, then to the mass of water below me, then back to the skyline again.

I stood there for a minute, mentally thanking Joe for all he did for me. Then I began to lean.

Further.

Further.

Further.

Until an unknown hand grasped onto my arm, preventing me from falling.

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**OOH I'M JUST GONNA KEEP YOU HANGING ON WITH ALL THE CLIFFHNAGERS (i'm sorry please don't kill me)**


	6. Chapter 6 (final chapter)

That hand gripped my arm so tightly. I didn't turn around to see who it was, it didn't matter anyway. I'd be gone soon enough, I'd be with Joe again. I tried to free myself, but it only gripped harder. I still stood there unmoving, void of all emotion. I struggled more, trying to escape it's grasp, and after a minute or so, finally got free.

I started to lean again now, quicker than before, determined to complete my mission, until the owner of the hand screamed "STOP!" and wrapped it's arms around my waist. "You can't do this! Just get down and explain to me what happened and I will help you, I promise, just please stop!" The voice said, cracking with every word. It sounded desperate, and on the brink of tears.

I stopped leaning.

I don't know what it was about this voice that compelled me to stop, but I did.

I got off the railings, one by one.

I still didn't turn around.

The voice asked "Now, please step completely away from the edge. Please. All I want to do is help you, you can't do this, you just can't.", sounding even more desperate than before.

I did what it asked me to, and finally turned around to see who had had such an impact on me.

It was a tall, lanky man, his facial features quite sharp, with piercing blue eyes and charcoal black hair that swept over his forehead.

I stared at him, tears beginning to prick my eyes and pool on my lower eyelashes, then gradually streak down my face one by one.

He stared back at me, examining my face, his eyes showing a mixture of emotions that I couldn't read.

As soon as he noticed the tears begin to flood my eyes, he pulled me into a warm embrace.

I don't know to this day what it was about him that made me feel so comfortable without even knowing his name, but I cried into his shoulder for at least an hour, letting out all the emotion that had lead up to me being on this bridge in the first place.

He saved my life, and I don't know how or why.

He said "I promise I will help you. You'll never have to resort to such drastic measures again, I promise."

And I believed him.

There was something about him that made me believe that he was being honest, that maybe he could help me, that maybe he could be a friend to me.

While I was wrapped in his arms, I felt the void begin to fill slightly.

Maybe he could help me fill the void.

Completely.

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**_AUTHOR'S NOTE_**** : I'm sorry for the sappy ending idk I just couldn't think of anything else I'm so sorry :/ Well, seeing as this is the final chapter *cries*, could you guys maybe give me a prompt for the next story? It may not bee soon, but I'll get one done! **  
**THANK**


	7. the chapter that's not a chapter

**_AUTHOR'S NOTE_**** : Hey guys, I know this story is finished but I just re-read the plot draft I wrote and thought it was funny, so thought I'd post it just for the crack. **

**ALSO, user DovahFinn and I are planning the plot for a sequel together, so look forward to that!**

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void (dan's pov)

plot - he came out as bi, most people close rejected him, still loves his bro tho, goes w/ said bro to muse concert, attacked when walking home, dat bro be hospitalised, dat bro be dead now, dan currently in mourning (he feels VOID OF DA HAPPYS get it now), can't take it any more, goes to stand on a bridge ready to jump reli, feels a hand grab him saying don't jump n all dat shit (doesnt turn around for dat chapter), turns round n it's phillip, convinces him to step away from the ledge, hugs n happiness, phil promises to help dan, dan feels da void PHIL up (lol)

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**I swear I don't write like that all the time it just amused me**


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